Apart from the fact that I am in serious, SERIOUS countdown mode for a swashbuckling adventure - bikini buying traumas notwithstanding - I am actually doing some genuine contemplation on the whole 'next life scenario' schiznitz.
Well, attempting to anyway.
Visions of swimming pools and cocktails, and the two combined, keep running through my head and interrupting our regularly scheduled program.
For some reason a pirate swings in every so often too.
Where was I again?
I have been very guilty in the past - oh let's face it, I am guilty in the present - of putting off making decisions. I farnarkle about, I find other things to do, I help other people make brilliant life choices - while I procrastinate wildly and rearrange my shoes by colour and brand.
Which admittedly is important - they are shoes, people!! - but really doesn't get me anywhere near where I need to be in terms of the serious stuff.
This is changing.
I am making up my mind as to where I want to be, both physically and mentally. It has - and is - taking a lot of soul-searching, and quite a few pros and cons lists, but there is clarity coming from said note scrawling and a feeling of hopefulness and strength.
And that's where my gratitude stems from. Finally getting a bit of focus into my future.
Sometimes we need a push to make us stand on the rose of the compass and see which way the prevailing wind is blowing. Sometimes the wind is in a direction we may not have expected; sometimes the breeze may be fickle and we may need auxiliary power to supplement our sails.
But that's OK.
I always keep a set of oars about the place.
You never now when you might be becalmed.
Or conversely, need to hit marauding pirates for being naughty.
And I am back poolside.